JUST READ: SYLVIA PLATH'S THE BELL JAR

"To the person in the bell jar,
blank and stopped as a dead baby, the world itself is the bad dream."
-Esther Greenwood

Thanks to Frauee for lending me the book. Reading this shortly before college days are over. 

Yeah, I'm a late-bloomer type of a reader. Better late than never. :-) 

/edit

So, I'm done reading the book and honestly crammed to get it done so that I could return it to the lender yesterday.

I kinda like the shorts from the Johnny Panic and the Bible of Dreams (also by Plath) more than The Bell Jar. 

 Score: 

WE ARE THE CHILDREN OF UNENDING GRACE

The UST@400 Baccalaureate Celebration, 25 March 2011

Define happiness. 
When you try to put everything into words, you'll definitely ran out and get lost.  

What a blessed day that was for the UST Quadricentennial batch. :-) 

/foto credits to Frau, DJ and JC. Nipped em, guys, and compiled. :-p 

WILL THERE BE ANY STARS IN MY CROWN?

Last Monday (21March), we had this culminating activity in school sponsored by our very own AB Guidance Counselor Ma'am Gina. It's a little send-off som'n for the Seniors. She's given each of us an envelope with 10 colorful stars and 10 different words of affirmation in it. You hafto stick out those happy stars to your friends' uniform if you think they deserve the specific label the most.

Sidetrack: Are you familiar about The 5 Love Languages? Do you know what's your primary language? If yes, then that's cool of you, if not, then you must take the test ASAP here. I got a confirmation on my primary language (though I'm a little bit of everything) not so long ago after a friend so dear introduced this thing to me. :-)

Anyroad, one of em 5 Love Languages is "Words of Affirmation." And who doesn't want to hear wonderful words of appreciation from our loved ones, right? And what more if these words are written on stars? Put in a nutshell, it feels so good that it lifts your spirit skyward. :-)

See what I got:

1. Red star says, "You are a family to me." - I got two from sister Frauee and my daughter Chebak. :-)

2. Orange (wutt's vvong w/ the orange here??) star says, "You are amazing just the way you are."- I got three from Ivanhoe, Jedork and Daniboy. You think I'm amazing, huh?? Thanks heaps, guys!

3. Yellow star says, "You bring out the best in me."- I got one from Tini. That's so sweet!

4. Lt. yellow star says, "You always brighten up my day."- I got one star from Cy. Hehe. She mebbe thinks my jokes are funny. At least I know I have one person who buys my jokes. :-p

5. Green star says, "I know I can trust you."- I got two stars. One from Tini and another one from Jedork. This is the most heartfelt star methinks just because it talks about TRUST. So, I was so touched when these two friends gave the green one out to me. :-)

6. Blue star says, "I can depend on you."- I could never go blue as I got one from Jillyjeans! Aw, quickmelt. :-)

7. Pink star says, "I'm lucky I met a friend like you."- Got one from Glennybum. She's my first close friend in town, yknow. :-) I remember freshman year.

8. Lt. pink star says, "I appreciate your small gestures of kindness."- One from Jedork. Wee, that's the third star from the kid. So nice! :-)

So there, I am blessed to have 12 assorted stars stuck on my uniform. I thank God for giving me friends!

The other two stars to complete the 10 are: "You have a great insight" and "I admire your sense of responsibility." :-)

So when it was my turn to hand out em stars to my mates, I was panic-stricken in a good way, if there's any. Just because 10 stars ain't enough for all of my friends I could even generously give out two or three stars for one friend!! I wished to have more but it seems that it's too limited that I must really have to pick one star for who deserves it the most.

Here I go,

1. I gave the red "You are a family to me" star to Frauee just because she is the closest sister to me and that's beyond proven. No questions asked.

2. The orange "You are amazing just the way you are" star to Ivanhoe because e looks like Bruno Mars. Haaaa, JK. Seriously, he's one of the most amazing kid that I met because he's got his own way to make you feel so special, you'll cry in joy. LOL. Seriously man, you're amazing. Thanks for that.

3. The yellow "You bring out the best in me" star is for Chebak. Try talking to her and she'll make you feel that you are her best friend. I will miss this kid, f'sho.

4. I gave the lt. yellow "You always brighten up my day" star to Dae and Tini (I'm blessed to have two of this star cos Jillyjeans shared some. Thanks, tita!). These are the kids who call my name out loud when once I get inside the classroom! When they shout "KAKIIII!!!," I can't help but bounce back a bright smile. :-)  

5. The green "I know I can trust you" star is for Frauee. She earned it, so why think twice? :-)

6. I gave the blue "I can depend on you" star to Jedork because through it all, he's been there to give his hand, shoulder and time without a shade of hesitation in all aspects. I'm so sure I've got a friend in him. I felt that, bro. Thank you so much! :-)

7. The pink "I'm lucky I met a friend like you" star is for Glennybum. Nah, not lucky, but SO BLESSED to have this itsy-bitsy friend from the very start. I'm gonna miss you, woman!! :-)

8. I gave the lt. pink "I appreciate your small gestures of kindness" star to my chirpy friend JC! She's not that showy, touchy and what-have-you type but once she's given you comfort in any way, she makes sure you'll feel it. Oh, she's my jam-along buddy, too! Have you heard our song covers?? :-p

9. The lt. green "You have a great insight" star is for Audrey. Yes, for that man. The fact that he is a sage can tell all. Haha! But, no kidding, he's the type that will drag (not in a violent way,k..) you to the corridors when he feels that somn's wrong with you. And he can easily tell if there is. He'll ask you what's the problem and give out the most diplomatic advice you'll ever want to hear. No exaggerations here. Thank you, Auds! P.S. When almost everyone in class calls me 'Kaki,' he calls me 'Kika.' Woot. ;-)

10. And last but not the least, the i-forgot-what-color "I admire your sense of responsibility" star is for Jillyjeans. No need to argue in here, guys. She will indeed impress you. When most of the kids are still starting to get their acts together for a school requirement, she's already done doing it. Wow lang. :-)

I know I could never go wrong with stars as they bring out the natural bliss.

Oh what a day that was. :-)

IF THERE'S SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN HERE

With spring comes my hope that 

frozen hearts and cold feet will be thawed.

THE SHELF-ISH SIDE OF ME

One of my interior design dreams is to have some very stirring bookshelves that will practically give me the unending hunger for reading. I have a white bedroom with soft orange halogen lights and majority of the stuff inside are in natural colors-- charcoal, pearl, sand and wood. So with that, I've been in the pursuit of finding a perfect match of bookshelves for my room. Prolly a more relaxed, laid-back natural feel in it.

So, if I'll be given a chance of buying em shelves or better having em customized, they'll look like one of these:

1) A 2-in-1 sofa/bookcase. So savvy. I'm actually asking my dad to buy me a sofa bed instead of a bed frame, but when I saw this, I might ask for a sofa/bookcase instead. Who says I need a bed? /loljk

Only that I need some foam in there for long hours of reading.
 Obviously, I will still need a bed if I'm gon have this.

 2.) A white installed shelf/rack. It's made of wood where the color matches with the contemporary-minimalist interiors. I liked it because of the cylindrical poles so to give a curved rather than edgy surface for my room. 

3.) So let's stand up for that eco-friendly vibe and have one of these, yes? Call 'em the indoor trees of knowledge, literally!

Red so fierce! 

Never separate this combo. They remind me of winter trees. Simply dramatic.

This is prolly the simplest that I can ask for.

So there.

Look, I really don't have a large collection of books yet so, prolly having the idea of 'em shelves will motivate me to buy moooore books.

from L-R starting from the top: (1) Summit Media magazines and Sunday school handouts;
(2) 2 layers of novels; (3) newly-compiled handouts and thesis copy from senior year;
(4) 2 layers of journals and novels

This one's located in our family hall. In it are my books when I was still 4,
some devotional guides and daddy's architecture books. /excuse the wrong foto angle. oops!

My journals really need some decent space, yes?

Derr ya gow! :-)

/foto credits to www.digdigs.com and LomoLomo app

JUST READ: J.D. SALINGER'S THE CATCHER IN THE RYE

This is just another bildungsroman novel in line with Huck Finn, The Perks of Being a Wallflower and To Kill a Mockingbird where the protagonist is going on some maturity and all them crazy stuff.

I finished the book in two sittings, it was actually an easy book to read all through the last leaf of it but I just had to hit the sack, thus the cut.

Reading The Catcher in the Rye, like Holden, got me "killed" for some reasons, only that he had to be killed over twenty times in the whole novel. Poor chap, he gets himself killed saying, "it killed me."

1. Language

Here's a little som'n: there's this extensive use of the adverb "and all." For all I cared, 'twas written 343 bloody times! Yes, I tallied it for feet's steak! HAHA. Let alone those other keywords.

Much to my dismay is how Holden's mouth is filled with profanity. I am honestly bothered while reading. And why wouldn't I be? He was even told off by some people in the story. He be cursin' real bad. REAL BAD. 

2. Symbolisms

Salinger got plenty of them but the ones that I actually did like were these:

a. "The Catcher in the Rye"


According to SparkNotes, in ref. to ch22 of the novel, Holden wants to catch children before they fall out of innocence into knowledge of the adult world and stuff.

At first I thought that the "rye" is actually a place in New York, 'cause it's also in the map. NY was mentioned a couple of times in the novel where it was described as a messy place for boys like Holden and things like that. I mean, New York's pictured as an adult's world.

b. Holden's red hunting hat

It kept croppin' in throughout the novel and I was thinking even on the first mention of the hat that it has something to do with the protagonist. It was a bit ridiculous but, methinks he puts the hat on important moments like when he was writing about Allie's mitt, staring at the mirror acting tough, when he left the dorm and when he's kind of vulnerable in some way.

It was also mentioned of how the hat has become so important to Holden that when he wears it he would pretend not to care what the others may think about how he looks like. He says, "I took my red hunting hat out of my pocket and put it on-- i didn't even give a damn how I looked." 


Holden hates corny things, but the corny thing is actually on his head and he doesn't give a care about it.


Or I have somn about the color red-- on how it's associated with the head (Allie's hair, the hunting hat). I mean, red could be politically claimed as rebellion, then I remember that communist thing, the bloodshed and all the fierce correlations about the color.

Maybe, red (rebellion) starts in the head.

c. The light

Holden always prefers the light turned on. He seeks for it figuratively in the story, but he's searching for it in all the wrong places.

d. Death

It was seen real in Holden's life. The loss of Allie his brother, his classmate James Castle and even how Pencey built their establishments from the money earned by funeral parlor bargains. Death, being everywhere, led him think about his own demise in the hands of this reality.

3. Religion

He dealt with his life apart from faith and religion. Holden's a self-proclaimed "sacrilegious" atheist but never had a good point in telling why. I didn't see how strong he was with his claim just like someone who shoves his way sayin', "I hate Twilight! Twilight sucks" without an apparent reason. HAHA I remember one guy saying how he dislikes pop-culture when he's actually living his way in it. Funny.

Some people really got it all wrong particularly on that atheist thing. Like, how could you even renounce that there is a God when you actually have the idea of a 'God?'

4. Mr. Antolini's quote

"Once you get pass all the Mr. Vinsons, you're going to start getting closer and closer-- that is, if you want to, and if you look for the it and wait for it-- the kind of information that will be very, very dear to your heart. Among other things, you'll find that you're not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You're by no means alone on that score, you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You'll learn from them-- if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry."

This got me, okay. It's 'nuff said.

So, bulgar words be set aside, the plot was indeed a good one.  

Score:  

WHAT NOW?

Perhaps I should write a little more.
Here.
Today.
For the rest of the summer, at least.

NO, I won't be coming from where we left off 'cause my last days in school have been (insert a negative word here). Life happened, the world doubled its noise and it left me silent (in a pretty good way,I can say). But the good Lord got me out of the rut as soon as possible.

Well anyways, you just missed the nonsense, that's all. :-)

So, now that school days are over and I've been staying in a more familiar place lately while waiting for graduation, I spend most of the time at home doing chores, watching series and reading a novel. Or if not, loitering here...

...in our subd's winding roads and ampitheater, 

and here..

...beside the pool and FEU's parking lot, hehe. (Oh, there's my kid brother over there)

So basically, life's been rolling fine for the past days. Yeah, just chillin' like a chinchilla. ;-)

/ used the LomoLomo app for the fotos

TO JAI, MY ALLY

Back to us.
It always comes around back to us.

JAI: We do learn things about ourselves by talking to each other. I'm glad this was never taken away at all despite the wars we went through. Lol.

ME: Di ba nga, we both believe that we will always find our way back to those church steps (the place where we became the best of friends) and appreciate the things that had led us here. Thank you!

J: It's our specialty: we can always go back to where we have left off no matter what happened or what we did. :-)

M: Rakenrol! All we need to be reminded of is that we won't completely lose each other. No matter whack! ;-)

After all, we were shaken, but not stirred.

Q016

My daddy always said that if the good Lord can take the time to care for something as small as a baby sparrow nesting in a tree, then surely He could take the time to listen to a little girl in Ringgold, Georgia. So every night before I went to bed I got down my knees and begged the Lord to find me a way out of this town. And every morning, I woke up in the same old place. 

                                              Looking For Salvation at The Dairy Queen | Susan Gilmore

I think it's clear why I'm still here. This place is not done with me yet.