Because it's Manila Day...

... we don't have to go to school.

I spent the entire day watching movies, net loitering, reading Rumi and sleeping. I love to do this sometimes-- locking myself inside the dorm, feeling too lazy to go out except when I've finally felt the need to buy food. And when I've reached the zenith of my relaxation (though the news about the killings of journalists didn't contribute to that relaxation idea),then that's the perfect time to go emo and think about things that I refrained to entertain for the best 12-15 hours of my no-school day. Thanks for calling me a masochist. Lol.

Thoughts about indifference, a recent heartbreak, sickening expectations, and attachments led me to...

my conciousness to say amen to what Rumi said:

We know separation so well because we've tasted the union. Longing becomes more poignant if in the distance you can't tell whether your friend is going away or coming back. The pushing away pulls you in.

...which led me to surrender to that given fact and fessed up:

"I miss you so much."

... which led me to find out that I'm not relaxed anymore.

I'm stressed.

My Worst Habit

My worst habit is I get so tired of winter
I become a torture to those I'm with.

If you're not here, nothing grows.
I lack clarity.
My words tangle and knot up.

How to cure bad water? Send it back to the river.
How to cure bad habits? Send me back to you.

When water gets caught in habitual whirlpools,
dig a way out through the bottom
to the ocean. There is a secret medicine
given only to those who hurt so hard
they can't hope.

The hopers would feel slighted if they knew.

Look as long as you can at the friend you love,
no matter whether that friend is moving away from you
or coming back toward you.

Don't let your throat tighten with fear.
Take skips of breath all day and night,
before death closes your mouth.

The Essential Rumi

FIRST DAY HIGH

(late post; written last 16June2010)

Wednesday marked the first day of the rest of my Senior year. With a 12nn-3p.m. schedule on that day, I was completely looking forward for more time to mingle with my long-missed friends than the hours to be spent inside the classroom talking about the course requirements and stuff. It happened as expected. Before the class started, I got to eat lunch with Tin and Bianca at Pasta Plate (while I’m still on my McDo appetite), talked about this “Dreaded Jock” Tin’s been digging during her OJT days till now, Bianca’s super nice mentor who lent her Murakami books when she was seen reading one, and my CAMANAVA adventures and daily crime encounters which boosted my resistance to heat and forcefully inserted a mental compass in my head when it comes to beat emergencies and errands. I was stuffed enough with pasta and stories.

First class: Sport Journalism with Ma’am Cielo Perez—my last year research professor. It went out fine, for the very reason that she released us early, something like an incentive, subliminally telling us “Thanks for not being lazy to go to school even if you only got one subject for today”. Oh yeah, she was cool enough to do that which made everyone happy.

So right after Sports Journ, the class split into their respective troupe and off they go to God knows where. Frau and I went to Cerealicious to grab our blockbusters (thanks to her for carrying the 50% of the treat). And soon after taking it out, we sat along with the group at Antonio St. who, at that time, was having their lunch. Che, Son, Jed, and I went to SM San Lazaro soon after we accompanied Audrey to the USTH to have his pee checked, some kind of a lab test, yeah. Going back, IDK exactly what Son bought in National Bookstore but it took him a while, falling in line. Good heavens, magazines saved the rest of us. So there, finally, to kill time, we splashed on some flavoured crashed ice from Pinoy Sno. Margarita for me and Che, Lime for Son and Raspberry for Jed—solved! It’s now time to go home.

That was about four in the afternoon when I get back to the dormitory. I decided to rest for a while and watch Julie and Julia again while waiting for the 6p.m.dinner with Glen! Huzzah! On the side note, can I just say it over and over that I love Julia Child and Julie Powell? These women are adorable! And btw, I love Meryl Streep ferreal and starting to get into Amy Adams most especially when she’s in that hoodie-graphic tee-tattered jeans-sneaks look which I already mentioned in Twitter, btw. Haha! So moving on, 6p.m. came just in time. Haha!

I met Glen at the AB Pav and went to P. Noval ‘cause I wanted her to try the sizzling thing in one of the carinderias there. Hoo! She ordered Chicken Curry though ‘cause she thought it will be served in a sizzling plate too. Lol. I grabbed a platter of Pancit Canton, the authentic one, and feasted upon the liver mixed into the dish. Delish!

Here goes the itchy feet in me again so, we both decided to go for a walk around the univ, not to mention that my ankles suck in big pain because of my newly-born blisters. I said we won’t go home if we can’t think of a new twitter name ‘cause openkakiness is so tired already, I think. So here, we came up with three: seedofkaki (Seed of Chuckie), kakitonic (catatonic-- am I?) and kakidoodledoo (which is so long and lame LOL). So what do you think is best?! Hahaha.

We can‘t think of anything anymore so we decided to go home already and it’s getting late as well.

So there, one day down, and a lot more to go. *u*

YOU’RE THE BOSS, APPLESAUCE

(late post; written last 16 June 2010)

What comes to your mind every time you hear the word Senior? If I were to be asked, I could definitely say that as you reach that level in your academic year, you feel a lot more confident than ever. Like there’s this automatic mechanism in your body that makes you swagger down the corridor and say hi and smile to a lot of people you know of for the past three years (or even those you barely even know of). It’s as if you know the ins and outs of the university. You become more gutsy and nervous-free, to say--when it comes to meeting new teachers most especially when you find out that you’ll be under the same professor for most of your subjects which has been your same prof last year. Hee. Less fingers are now crossed, praying that you won’t meet a terror one. You’re familiar with most of the things around you, if not all.

That’s how it is--the stereotypical notion of a boss is now in your system. But oh, don’t you ever abuse that god-given right. K? K.

(Click foto to enlarge)

I keep a lot of sticky notes in my journals and planners (no wonder they are bulky and accident-prone). Yeah, I even keep a lot of precious junk inside my memory boxes. Yesterday, I had the luxury of time to flip through my ‘09&’10 planners and found those stuff up there. *fireworks* So, if you see yourself in the photo (haha! I nipped your fezz somewhere around the net, sorry), Hi! :p

I hope you are aware that once in your friggen life, you gave me a token for keeps. Thank you, you’re so sweet! *u* Seeing them once again makes me happy. *u* Sublime eh.

*Tumblr cross-post*

Indie In My Own Way

While the nation is celebrating the 112th Philippine Independence Day, all I can do is to wave an imaginary flag while it's raining hard up here in the cold mountains of the South and think of something "indie" to do.

Anyways, I am on my mark to set up a new sideline in my interweb life- something more fruitful than clicking my heart out and rummaging someone else's profile and reblogging to death (like I can go through one blog account/day), something to unsheathe my personality and something that can hone my social relations. I think I'm ready to sift my thoughts between the ones that I can silently write on my journal and the ones that I can broadcast over the blogsphere. Let's consider this as an act of independence-- the choice to breathe my musings out without the feeling of being held back (due to personal reasons) and without needing someone to get it done but my own self. Lulz. (indie enough,eh?! Haha!) *u*

Fact:

I am not a wide-blogger or I may say the one who jots his/her thoughts down once in a while here in the www. I have a LiveJournal account and managed to abandon it after a few posts which I do not regret. Lol. I'm more committed to my diary entries which I faithfully carry out since I was in my Junior year in HS to date. For the record, I'm already writing on my 19th journal and counting.

For those who know not, I'm a notebook freak but let's talk about that on a separate blog. K? K.

So here, with no red carpet foreword needed...

Universe, meet my blogger account.